Resolutions
by BlueDream1
Summary: Sawyer has something to tell to Kate. How will she react to it, especially after Jack returns? Set after The Last recruit. Possible spoilers for The candidate.


**Warning:** Possible spoilers for tonight´s eppy!

**Declaration:** I don't own Lost or Jate (sadly)

**Resolutions**

˝Can I ask you something, Freckles? ˝Sawyer said, finally breaking the silence.

They were sitting inside of the cages, backs leaned against the bars, not really talking to each other since the fight they had had upon their arrival there, when she once again attacked him for causing Jack to jump. Shouting at him that he had no right to do it, she had stormed off towards one of the angles of the cage, placed herself down and hadn´t talked ever since, refusing to look in his direction and generally avoiding him, drawing her knees to her chin and losing herself in her thoughts. He knew better than to disturb her, so he had settled himself down too, thinking about everything that had happened in the past couple of weeks.

She didn´t answer to him question, but she didn´t tell him to shut it either, so he decided it was safe enough to continue. ˝Why did you do it? Why did you agree to blow up the damn nuke? ˝he asked, causing her to look up.

Their eyes locked and she held his gaze for a moment; then, deciding that there was no point in beating around the bushes anymore, simply said: ˝Because I love him. ˝

Sawyer nodded slowly, their eyes staying locked for a moment before they both looked down, silence enveloping them once again. He threw a couple of glances in her direction, secretly, debating with himself whether to do it or not. There they were, in the place where they had made love for the first time; the place where he had told her he loved her – the first time he ever said that to a woman and actually meant, that is. But, although the place was the same, _they_ weren´t. Lots of things had changed since then, and they were both aware of it. Both of them had found love in another person. And both of them had lost that person, in one way or another. Then there was also the issue of Jack. Even though he would never openly admit it, Sawyer knew deep down that a part of him still searched for revenge to Jack, for setting off the bomb and killing Juliet. The old _If-I-can´t-have-the-woman-I-love-then-I´ll-make-sure-you-can´t-too_ motto was still growing somewhere inside of him. He knew it was childish, but he couldn´t help himself.

He looked at her again; then shook his head, cursing silently under his breath. She had been miserable for the past couple of days they had spent with Locke – or whatever that thing was – and he would be a fool not to know the reason behind her misery. As much as a part of him was still angry at Jack, she didn´t deserve it. She deserved to be happy. And if it meant Jack would be happy too, then be it.

He looked around the cages one last time, letting go of all the memories binding him to that place; then, mouthing an obligatory Son of a bitch; quietly said: ˝He did it for you, you know? ˝

Kate looked up, confused.

˝The nuke. ˝he explained. ˝He blew it up because of you. ˝

Kate stared at him, speechless. ˝How...W-what do you mean? ˝

Sawyer looked away and took a deep breath, then turned towards her again: ˝When we went to talk...that...that day; I asked him why he was doing it...˝

˝He did it so everyone who died could get another chance. ˝she said, dully.

˝Yeah, that too. ˝Sawyer said, deciding to ignore the anger at the irony of precisely that plan being what killed Juliet. ˝But I asked him what he had from it. ˝he said, and Kate looked up again. ˝And he said that he had had you and he had lost you. ˝

Kate scrunched her face.

˝Now, I don't know what happened between you two back there, ˝he said, looking her in the eyes, ˝but the good old Doc obviously thinks he messed it up too bad to fix it in this life, so he wanted to try with the next one. ˝he finished, snorting in disbelief.

Kate looked at him, stunned. Then Jack´s words echoed in her mind again. _Enough of it was_. Only this time, they had a completely different meaning. She realized that he wasn´t referring to their life together as ´misery´, but that he was too ashamed of what he did, of what he said, of what pills and booze turned him into, and was considering it beyond repair.

˝Why…why didn't he tell me? ˝she said quietly, not really sure if she was talking to Sawyer or herself.

˝The hell if I know! ˝Sawyer said. ˝Probably because you´re both so damn stubborn that you would rather blow up the nuke than sit down and talk! ˝he finished, frustrated.

Kate looked up at him; then, after a while said: ˝Why are you telling me this? ˝

˝What? ˝

˝Why are you sticking up for Jack? ˝she asked.

Sawyer looked at her for a moment; then said, holding her gaze: ˝Because I want you to be happy. ˝

She held his gaze for a while; then nodded and smiled, grateful. ˝Thanks, Sawyer. ˝

˝Anytime, Freckles. ˝

(_After a couple of hours; it´s night…_)

They were startled by a sound of a gunshot, followed by another one, and another one; and before they were able to determinate where they were coming from, their guards had crashed down, dead. Kate reacted on an instinct, crunching down and reaching for a gun of one of the guards that was lying face down in front of the cage; managing to put her fingers around it a moment before the sounds of the footsteps approaching were heard. Scared, she pointed the gun in the direction of the sounds; Sawyer standing by her side; the rest of them standing, equally alert, slightly behind.

Not knowing what or who to expect, she had her finger steady on the trigger, ready to start shooting; but the face she saw next was the one she didn't expect to see, at least not so soon.

˝Jack. ˝she mouthed, lowering the gun instantly, the relief over seeing him evident on her face, despite anger and betrayal she was still feeling.

But then another man came out, and Kate immediately tensed, raising her gun again.

˝Kate, it´s okay. He´s with me. ˝She looked at him, half surprised, half annoyed; and he had to resist to laugh at the way her eyebrows crunched together. ˝I got this. Trust me. ˝he pleaded, with those deep chocolate eyes, and she found herself lowering the gun before even being aware of it.

She stepped away while he crashed the lock on the cages; then moved aside to let them out. They shared a short look as she was leaving the cage; but then it was time for explanations, so she let him talk. And as she watched him stand in the circle and explain how they fought Widmore´s people, she couldn't resist not smiling. She could finally see the traces of the old Jack – _her_ Jack – in him after all this time.

˝…but you have to decide quickly, because it won´t take them long to discover they´re missing people. ˝he finished, tired.

Kate used the opportunity when everyone else was busy with deciding what to do, to approach him.

˝Can I talk to you for a second? ˝

Jack turned around, absorbing her in with his eyes for a moment before finally snapping out of it. ˝Yeah, sure. ˝he said, gesturing around.

Kate fixed him with her look. ˝In private. ˝she emphasized.

Jack held her gaze for a while; then nodded: ˝Sure. Lead the way. ˝

She headed into the jungle and he followed, stopping when they reached a little clearing.

˝So? ˝he said awkwardly, after a few moments of complete silence.

˝SO? ˝she repeated, blood starting to boil in her veins. She looked around to check if anyone could hear them; then asked, barely controlling her anger. ˝Wanna tell me why the hell did you jump off of that boat?! ˝

Jack sighed, running his hand through his hair. He knew this was coming. ˝Kate, I… ˝

˝You WHAT, Jack? ˝she shouted, her eyes sending daggers in his direction.

He paused for a moment; then, finding her gaze, stubbornly said: ˝I jumped because I had to. Because I wasn´t… ˝he said; then corrected himself. ˝Because the island wasn´t done with me. ˝

Kate gritted her teeth, wanting nothing more than to slam his head against the nearest tree. ˝The _island_, Jack?! The _island_?! ˝

Jack looked down; then up at her again: ˝Yes, Kate, the island. ˝He paused; then added: ˝I wasn't not ready to leave it. Not yet. ˝

Kate took a step forward, locking her eyes with him. ˝And what about me, Jack? ˝she asked, causing him to look up. ˝You were ready to leave _me_? ˝

He pain in her voice was audible and he looked away. ˝Kate, I…˝

˝You jumped without even saying goodbye, Jack! ˝she yelled, her voice breaking. ˝Was it really that easy for you to just forget about us? ˝

Jack stood silent for a while, watching her struggle to keep her emotions under control; then said quietly, barely above a whisper: ˝I didn't know there was ´us´, Kate.

She turned to face him, irritated. ˝You know, Jack, it´s really time you stop with that! ˝

˝Stop with what? ˝

˝That whole _I-made-a-mistake-so-now-I-should-suffer-eternally_ crap! she said, wiping her cheek with the back of her sleeve; then turning around again and taking a step forward. ˝Sawyer told me. ˝she said, her voice softer now.

Jack looked at her. ˝Told you what? ˝he asked, swallowing hard.

She took another step forward, putting her hand on his arm. ˝Why you set the bomb off. ˝

Their gazes met and the time seemed to come to a halt as they stared into each others´ eyes; the weight of all the unsaid words and missed opportunities hanging above their heads. She moved slightly to her left, so that she was now standing in front of him, one hand still clutching his, the other coming to rest at his torso.

˝Why didn't you tell me? ˝she whispered, pained; and he closed his eyes.

˝Because I didn't think there was still chance. For us. Not in this life anyway. ˝he said. ˝Nor in the other one, apparently. ˝he added sadly.

˝Jack…˝she started. It was killing her to see him so hopeless, so resigned. It was as if he had already given up on his happiness; a puppet in the hands of the island the only thing that remained of him.

¨Kate, don´t. ˝he said, stepping away. ˝I can´t… I don't want to deal with this right now. ˝

She felt anger rising inside of her again. ˝Well, maybe I want! ˝she said, yanking his arm back.

He turned around, freeing himself from her grip; then, raising his hands in frustration, said: ˝What do you want from me, Kate?! Just what the hell is it that you want?! ˝

She pushed herself in his face. ˝I don't know, Jack! Evereything´s pretty f***ed up! I don't even know which century I am supposed to love you in, ˝she said, frustrated, ˝but I know that I do. ˝she said, wiping away the tears. ˝In all this mess, that´s the only thing that hasn't changed in any timeline. ˝she said, crying now. ˝And I don't want to lose you. ˝

He sighed. Not able to fight it anymore, he pulled her closer, letting her sink into his embrace; his arms wrapping around her fragile body as she curried her face into his chest, crying in earnest now; her small body shaking in his arms as he tried to comfort her, his palms making soothing circles across her back.

He waited until she started to calm down; then brought his hand on her face and lifted her chin, causing her to look up. She had a second to realize how similar the situation was to their first kiss and then his lips crashed into hers…

.....

_She´s in a cab, sitting next to a very pregnant Claire and pointing a gun at the driver, shouting at him to start driving. She turns around to see the marshal looking around, trying to spot her. She turns back to yell at the driver again; and then she sees him, standing 10 feet away, talking on his cellphone. She doesn't know what got into her; but she feels she knows that man. Not just from the plane - ´cause she just remembered it´s the same guy she stole the pen from – but this goes way, way deeper. She feels she knows the cologne he likes, the type of razor he uses and she´s almost sure she knows the shape of a scar he has on his back. Their eyes lock and she´s sure he has the same look of stunned confusion she has; but before she can think about it any further, she hears marshal shouting to stop the car and she´s back to her old self, adrenaline running high as she pushes the gun in the back of the driver´s head and screams at him to start moving…_

_.....  
_

_He´s on the phone, trying to explain to his mother that he doesn't know where his dad´s body is or when they´ll get it back. Suddenly, something makes him look up and then he sees her, sitting inside of a cab and staring at him with mouth half open: the woman from the plane. Only, she´s not just it. He doesn't know when, where or how, but he had already met her. And not just met her. He feels he knows her. Knows how she likes her coffee, how many freckles she has and, what´s the weirdest of all, he´s pretty sure he knows how her lips taste or how her skin feels under his fingertips. In fact, he can actually feel it right now. He starts to lower his phone, his mum´s words just a distant babbling to him; but before he can decide what to do next; the car starts moving; the shocked expression on her face the last thing he sees, before both the cab and the woman disappear from his sight…_

_.....  
_

They pulled away abruptly; their heads spinning, their hands clinging to each other for balance.

˝What the hell was that? ˝Kate asked, pale; her fingers clutching Jack´s shirt as they rested on his chest.

˝I have no idea. ˝Jack replied, breathless; equally stunned and confused as she was.

They stayed like that for a while; trying to understand what had just happened; until Kate quietly said: ˝Do you…do you think it worked? ˝she asked feebly, afraid to even say it aloud, considering the absurdity of it.

Jack´s eyebrows frowned. ˝Do I think _what_ worked? ˝

˝The whole…plane never crashing thing. ˝she said, and they both fell silent again, thinking about the possibility – and improbability – of something like that ever happening. After all, they were still here. On the island. ˝I mean…we were on an airport…and there was definitely marshal…and I was wearing the clothes I had when we crashed…˝she said, trailing off in her thoughts; then, snapping out of it, asked: ˝Do you think it´s possible? That the reset happened and we´re there…and yet, somehow, here too? ˝

Jack stared at her, the wheels in his head turning so fast it was almost painful. ˝I… I don't know. ˝Then, suddenly, he had another flash.

.....

_Desmond: Thanks, brotha. Something wrong?_

_Jack: No. No, you just…Do I know you from somewhere?_

_....._

˝But I know who does. ˝

She looked at him, raising her eyebrow.

˝Desmond. ˝

She raised her chin, looking at him with determination in her eyes.

˝Then let´s go find Desmond. ˝

Please R&R :)

p.s. Is anyone else really hyper for tonight´s eppy?! I really missed Lost!


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